Disappointment

It has really been a while posting up here.Life in here really upset me much simply, everything.A lot beside and even around me changed, got good and got bad.Losing the first love eventually really spoilled my entire feelings for the next, next and next and so on. Unfortunately..then I realized I myself did change as well. I couldn't believe this is actually me and now after realizing, I knew why and what made me changed. I don't wanna kept on being the one i used to be. It's they who forced me to be the one I am now. This is life..the thought of always ending my own life is no longer in my mind now but change. My change is sudden even I don't get use to myself yet..it's just so unbelievable that I really did what I never expected myself to really actually did it but I did and was done.

Trust, trusting a guy is no longer in my list.anymore. All guys to me are jerks. They are the one who made me feel disgusted. Guys are just so liars..good in acting. But I just hate it..there's this sentence I once went through "when there's an apple spoiled, so are the rest" I'm trying to re trust them buti realized they are just the same kind. Wanting me to be serious in one relationship is just o far away for me to get rid of these facts!

Working in JW MARRIOTT, isn't enjoying anyhow but not much to complained, society, real world are like that and I have to face it since I knew other working areas has these kind of so called politics internally.

I don't wanna feel paranoid in every single little things but it's hard..I'm frustrated in everything around me which is faking..I'm sick of it and I just don't wanna look at it at all..leaving this workingplace is a good choice of mine, secondly, have the plans to leave this particular country is also a very righty one for me as well so the hatred in here won't be too much.though..

After knowing the facts of everything around, there's no one to be trusted excluding myself..I only can trust my instincts..I lost trust in me, I lost the faith in me and these could made me lose myself..and so I can't I have to stand right back up..maybe Malaysia isn't a right place for me...so, it's time for me to leave very soon..the piece of me now is just like missing parts of the puzzle..the missing parts in me...
TRUST
FAITH
CONFIDENT
Andthats it to every relationship I had and so will be the recently one..my sign for leaving every each of this will be silent...and silence